April 21, 2011: Start with yourself

Hola, All! As I was reading the book "The Intuitive Spark" by Sonia Choquette, a particular paragraph jumped out at me. It brought back to mind about how I was raised which affected how my children were raised.
" If you are extremely goal oriented, evaluate your self worth by your performance, and don't tolerate slipups, then chances are that your kids will also strive for success in the same way in order to gain your approval. This kind of upbringing creates extremely anxious children, making it very tought for them to access their intuition, because whenever we're afraid, our distress overrides our inner voice or completely drowns it out. As a result, we grow up listening to our fears instead of our heart."
I can relate to how my self worth was related to my performance in school, etc; how I started having headaches in high school, never realizing it was the stress I put on myself; how my intuition was shut down for years; and how I listened to my fears instead of my heart. None of this could I have verbalized for years, and yet, looking back, this one paragraph from Sonia's book seems to sum up most of my life pretty well. I can't tell you how thankful I am for the people, books and experiences in my life that started changing my perception of myself, because that's where it has to start. I love the song by Michael Jackson........."I'm starting with the man in the mirror, I'm asking him to change his ways, And no message could have been any clearer,......take a look at yourself, then make a change". What great lyrics; we can even learn lessons from songs! I hope everyone knows that each of us is worthy of the best that life can offer. That all of us, no matter what religion or no religion, are children of an abundant God Who always showers us with His Love. To forgive ourselves is one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves and others. And, to connect with our intuition, is really connecting with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, which is in all children of God.
Pay attention to your inner guidance,
Dawnie

April 21, 2011: Workshop

Hola, All! In February I signed up to do a workshop called 'Guidance from Above' at Cathedral of Light; the workshop was supposed to take place April 16. Then, things started happening in my life...........such as cracking and having my tooth yanked out, my mom breaking her hip and having to go to rehab,and Kim and Austin visiting for two weeks. The last one was the only one that was pleasurable! I started feeling that I was going to have to cancel the workshop. That feeling became reality when I realized that I was going to have to pick mom up from the rehab in Round Rock and take her to a very nice assisted living/memory center in Belton. Of course, this happened the same week as my workshop. At that point, I cancelled the workshop, thinking that possibly I could do it at a later date. I wasn't upset because I needed to put all of my positive energy on having a pleasant experience moving mom to another place that she was going to have to adjust to. I'm sure it must be hard for someone who's memory is right on some days and out the window on other days. Last July she moved into the retirement center, after having lived in the same house for almost 40 years. Then she broke her hip and was moved from the hospital to the rehab center; now, another adjustment but this time she will be behind locked doors. That is why I needed all the positive energy that I could muster. After moving mom, I was drained for 2 days, and was so glad that I had the foresight to cancel the workshop. But, at Toastmasters on April 16, I gave an impromtu speech about Guidance from Above! I cancelled the workshop only to give an extremely short (7 minute) speech on the same topic. That was really fun! I gave the workshop no more thought until today. This morningI attended a book study, 'The Way of Mastery' which is led by Rev Kay, an 85 year young very wise woman who speaks to and hears from Jesus regularly. All during class I thought that she was looking at me more than usual. Of course, she makes eye contact with eveyone in the class; it just seemed different to me today. Maybe it's because I wanted to talk to her about things that were on my mind. After class I hung around to tell her that I wanted to visit with her sometime. But, even before I could say anything, she hugged me and told me that my workshop wasn't cancelled, only postponed. I was taken aback because the workshop wasn't even on my mind. Then, she repeated that Jesus had told her that it wasn't the right time for my workshop and that it would happen at a later date! I can't tell you how good it felt to have the workshop validated! I plan to visit with Rev Kay next week, and I'm sure that we will have a delightful time getting to know each other.
Listen to your inner voice,
Dawnie

April 14, 2011: Tooth

Hola, All! Several weeks ago, 2 days after mom fractured her hip, one of my molars cracked. When I went to see Dr. Jackson, the kindest dentist one could ask for, we talked about putting a crown on it........that would be the 7th crown in my mouth! I really wasn't in any pain, which was good since he didn't have a block of time to do it for 2 days. While at home a thought lightly crossed my mind about losing that tooth, but I dismissed it, not wanting to even think about that option. One suggestion that Dr. Jackson made was to bring my MP3 player and listen to music, or for me, to listen to meditative cd's. That was an excellent idea! The morning of my next visit Dr. Jackson talked to me about how he had to pull the part of the tooth that had broken but was still attached to the root. After he gave me a shot on either side of the tooth, he pulled the broken piece, only to tell me that the root was dead. He said, in his opinion, that I now had 2 options: to go ahead and crown the tooth or to pull it, which was his recommendation. He told me that this very same thing happened to his best friend, who elected to crown the tooth, only to have the tooth die 6 months later, and then it had to be pulled, which translated to more pain in the mouth. Not really taking any time to think about it, and feeling that I had already been told intuitively what to do, I agreed that it had to come out. He was surprised that I made that decision so quickly, but thankfully, I had already been 'warned'. For some reason, Dr. Jackson always refers the pulling of teeth to an oral surgeon, maybe because of complications that could occur....I don't know. , Dr. Steele, a kind man with an unhurried air about him, had an opening at 2pm. Truly I was hoping to go straight to the oral surgeon while my mouth was numb, but that didn't happen. My good friend, Jan B, drove me to and from my next appointment, since I had no idea if I would leave there loopy or not. After receiving 2 more shots, and given gas (which I have never had before), Dr. Steele pulled the molar but it really sounded like he ripped it out of my mouth! Almost the whole time at both offices I listened to a meditative relaxation cd over and over, plus I asked that Archangel Raphael surround me in his healing light. I know that Jesus was in the room with me also. I believe these are the reasons that I didn't have much pain afterwards, and that the hugh hole in my mouth healed so nicely. With graditude, Dawnie

March 27, 2011: Insights

Hola, All! Several weeks ago when my sisters and I were finishing cleaning out my mom's house because we had a contract on the house, a random thought crossed my mind. It said something like 'after the house sells, my mom will pass away'. When I mentioned this to my sister, Carol, she didn't realize that I meant that my mom would know about it intuitively. Her response was, "Well, who's going to tell her?" Since I've tried to talk to Carol before about what I believe and didn't get very far, I just dropped the subject. Today I was talking to my sister, Lynne, about it and she said she had the very same thought last week after our cousin, Peggy, died. Even though Peggy was our cousin, she was the same age as my mom. Peggy's mom (who was my mom's sister) was 21, pregnant with Peggy when my mom was born. How would you like to be pregnant at the same time as your mother!! Yikes! Something else I shared with Lynne was the thought that I am going to get a windfall. This thought came into my mind last month, and randomly continues to appear. My feeling is that it will happen because my mom would have died. Again, Lynne said she just had the same thought last week. Interesting that 2 of us have had the same 2 random, or not so random, thoughts, isn't it? Right before lunch Carol texted me that mom had fallen twice and is being taken to Scott and White Hospital in Round Rock to see if anything was broken. Whether anything is or not, I think we will be moving her from the retirement center to an assisted living center where mom can get more care. With her memory problems and her mobility lessening, it's time to move on. I'm pretty sure that mom is ready to be done with this life, and I can't say as I blame her. Bad news, I just found out that mom has broken her other hip and is having surgery today. Will up-date you later. Insights can be wonderful but they can also be stressful, if I let them. One way to release stress is by walking outside, which I am going to do right now. Dawnie

March 25, 2011: Love wins!

Hola, All! Stress is a funny thing; it can manufacture itself in our bodies in so many ways. I know that I have a very low tolerance for stress, as evidenced by the thousands of migrains that I have had over the years. They started when I was in high school, and continued regularly until about 7 years ago. In order to keep my stress level as low as possible, and therefore avoid the big "M", I have had to let things go, to work to become detached from many situations that could cause migrains to explode in my head. But, I have not completely freed my life of stress, or migrains, yet. Right now, in my life, is alot of drama with people who are very close to me. Of course, there are two opposing sides, people who can't seem to accept another's point of view; some seem to think theirs is the only right answer. As I have tried to maintain balance in myself, I have not been successful. Last week I was the recepient of another migrain; I don't get them very often any more but when I do, I also end up losing everything in my stomach (if you know what I mean). But, because this situation has lingered, and no matter how hard I try to not think about it, it is still there, lurking beneath the surface of my mind.
On Monday, I woke up with a bad tooth ache. Now, I've had many tooth aches in my life; it's quite obvious with all the crowns in my mouth. But, this ache was different in that it would be bad for awhile, then go away. It started in the upper left molar and made its way to the lower left molars so that the pain was basically all over the left side of my mouth. But, because it would come and go as it pleased, I wasn't sure what was causing it. So, on Wednesday I went to the dentist to make sure I didn't have another cracked tooth, even though I had just had
x-rays 2 weeks ago. He confirmed that there was not a cracked tooth, or anthing else wrong that he could find. He said that when he sees this kind of thing in patients that it usually is a sign of stress. Well, since I already suspected that diagnosis, I was not surprised.
When I get up in the early mornings, I read from "A Course in Miracles", and then meditate on what I read. Today's lesson said to clear my mind and listen for the Word of God in quiet, because His Word can't be heard until my mind is quiet for awhile. So, I cleared my mind to just listen and then I heard, "Replace fear with Love". Awww, doesn't that make so much sense? The rest of the day, or days, I will surround this situation and the people in it in God's white light of Love until my mind is saturated with Love, and my aches and pains have accepted that they have no place in my body any more.
Thanks be to God's Love of all His children.
Dawnie

March 14, 2011: SOLD!

Hola, All! Great news! Last month my sister, Carol, told me that we were scheduled to close on my mom's house on March 21 at 10am. This was good news in that we had a buyer for her house, and bad news in that my daughter, Kim, and sweet grandson, Austin, would be visiting me at that time. I really wasn't excited at all at having to miss time being with them. So, I asked my angels and our Creator to change the date of the closing so that I could spend as much time as possible with my family. To some of you this may seem selfish, but the truth of the matter is that our angels and Creator want us to be happy and they will do what they can to accommodate us. Also, if we don't ask for what we want, how are we ever going to get what we want? So, I asked, and left it up to them to do what needed to be done. I even told my sister, Jeanne, what I had done. I'm don't think she had as much faith in the process as I did. Then, surprise, surprise, surprise, Carol calls me to say that the closing has been moved up 6 days and now we are going to sign the papers at 10am Tuesday, March 15! Of course, I knew that it would all work out! But along came a snag, in that the people who were supposed to survey the land didn't complete their job. But, I held on to my faith that the closing would take place before Kim and Austin get here on Wednesday. Today Carol called and told me that we are closing tomorrow at 4pm!! This is great news in that the house will finally be out of our hands and I get to spend two whole weeks with my sweeties!
THANK YOU GOD/ THANK YOU ANGELS!!
Ask For What You Want,
Dawnie

March 13, 2011: Vision

Hola, All! Thursday morning as I walked to the rec center I could see something out of the corner of my left eye, something that looked like part of an outline of something, but it was clear. I knew it had something to do with my eye, which is weird since I've always had really good vision. As I continued to walk, I noticed that everytime I looked to the left, the thing also moved to the left so that I never could look at it head-on. Not really giving it much more thought, I went about my day. On Friday morning, as I was taking a shower, I suddenly saw a streak of light to the left of me. Now that's weird, I thought. But then, I noticed that every time I looked sharply to the left, I saw streaks of light. I thought back to when I last had my eyes checked, knowing it wasn't that long ago........September, 2010. At that eye exam, I told the dr that I had been seeing these black floaty spots for a couple of months. They come and go, and I never know when they will show up again. He told me that if anything changes, to call him because something had happened to him, and it turned out to be a detached retina. The strange thing about having a detached retina is that you don't even know it has happened. So many people think that when something a little different happens with their vision, it isn't important and that it will go away with time. This is true sometimes, and sometimes it isn't. So, when these weird things started happening, I made an appt with my eye dr, Dr Gambino, for that day (Friday). He ran some tests, but didn't find anything. Then, he personally called to make an appt for me with a dr. who specializes in retinas, for that afternoon. On top of that, he told me that he wasn't going to charge me for my visit; he is the kindest man! As I was driving to the next dr's office, one thing that I thought of was something that I read that morning: God wants only happiness for me. I repeated that saying over and over and over, along with asking God and the angels to put me in the best drs care. At Dr. Coors office, drops were put in my eyes to dialate them so she could examine them more closely. She said what was happening is fairly common but to call immediately if I start to see the 'outline' and/or streak of light directly in front of me. According to the pamplet that she gave me, these odd occurances are because of changes in the jelly-like substance (vitreous) which fill the back cavity of the eye; these are things that can happen as one ages. I drove home relieved that it was nothing serious, and also thankful for divine help. And, I was thankful that Ed and I were still able to go dancing that night, because it allowed me to release some of the stress that I was feeling.
Any chance you get, dance!
Dawnie